GUEST BLOGGER: Wilmington’s Arianna Faro Discusses Living With Rare Disease

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Although my blog does not especifically covers KTS ( KLIPPEL TRENAUNAY SYNDROME )
I have decided to incorporate Adriana Faro’s article about her inspirational and heartbreaking journey with one of the most rare and cruel illness known to man, KTS.

Ari, as we fondly call her, is one of the bravest, resilient, heroic, caring, loving, compassionate, smart, beautiful Inside and out young lady you could ever meet in your life.

At the tender age of 24, Arianna has endured over 100 plus surgeries. Yes, you read correctly, that many. Way too many for a young soul to endure. For any living person to endure.

And while she has undergone the unthikable, her infectious smile, her coquettish gaze, and her Angelic personalty have always permeated her actions and words.

Ari has many dreams and aspirations in her Brilliant mind and her tender heart.
One of them, is to garner awareness about KTS, a condition I, also share.

Although KTS bears no correlation with Meniere’s Disease or Migrsines, it is undoubredly, intertwined with Depression and Anxiety as most chronic illnesses are.

This is yet, another reason, why I decided to reblog this article on my own blog.

For the benefit of my KTS group, and of you, my readers I leave you now in the company of Arianna Faro.
You may want to follow her on Facebook
Arianna Faro, A limp at a time blog

She is the epitome of resilience and heroism.

Wilmington Apple

WILMINGTON, MA — Below is a guest blog post from Wilmington’s Arianna Faro in recognition of Rare Disease Day.

Hello there, everyone! My name is Arianna Faro, and I have been fortunate enough to call myself a resident of this exquisite town for just over 23 years. After having moved here on the cusp of turning 2, I have experienced an array of beautiful memories here with family and friends, and I know there are many more to come!

Despite all of the wonderful times, though, there has been a tremendous amount of hardship as well. That is because I was born with one of the rarest congenital disorders known to man, called Klippel Trenaunay Syndrome. Haven’t heard of it? You are hardly alone. The vast majority of doctors are not even aware of its existence, and the ones that are (even those who specialize it) are often at…

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Understanding the Language of Narcissistic Abuse. | elephant journal

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http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/10/understanding-the-language-of-narcissistic-abuse/

Him. Years, some years after I do. 

Are you watching Law and Order again?
Haven’t I told you to not waste time on those episodes ? Go on and read your Bible! 

Why do you use so many ice cubes, it is a waste of money you know ?

Did you go to the library again? What sort of books did you check out? Let’s see. ..Hmmm waste of time. Again.

From now on, in this house we don’t cook more than a cup of rice daily. Do you understand? 

Did you not hear the phone? Answer it. 
Minutes later.  Why did you have to say what you said?  You are always wrong. You never know how to speak to people. 

You have not accomplished anything in your life. Raising children. That’s all you have to show off for yourself to the world. 

Is that a new wrinkke, white hair, a new age spot? Children, look at your mother’s flaws … she is getting so old.  Snickering laughter from him.

You are in your mid thirties but he needs you to believe him desperately. ..you are old, undesirable, not worthy of praise anymore.

The final blow,
in this house I am the bread winner, all the money is mine and I do with it as I please. I am taking away all credit cards from you. Stop taking your medications. I would never take you back to see a doctor. Never.

You know your health is declining. You need his support to stay afloat but he is cutting off the oxygen supply.

BD ( before divorce ) I  am a slave to you all. You and the kids.

PD ( Post divorce ),

My chidren are the love of my life. I live just for them. I work for them only. 

Children never heard the phrase BD
They never heard any of the million put downs and criticisms behind their backs

Your daughter is lazy
Your son is arrogant
They will never mount to anything in this life.
Or

Your daughter is fat or slow or introverted or…
Your son is stupid, he is so full of it, he is not normal, and on and on and on …

These are the same children that post divorce are supposedly the love of his life? Ironic?  Hard to believe? That’s the facade the abuser hides behind it …

Oh, he knows how to torture you …where it hurts the most. But YOU and only YOU will hear these comments .

To the rest of the world, he is simply the BEST. The best father, the best husband, the best Co – worker, the best man at his parish, the best neighbor, the BEST yes, at hiding the truth and parade around, brim smile plastered on his face at the masquerade ball.
Because that is what his whole life has been, is and will be to the end, a perpetual masquerade ball.

The tears want to escape, salty and uncontrollably, but they have broken the dam so many times that you might welcome them or not. 

You think hard and remember. Remember the first time, the introduction, the sanctity of the ground you were standing up, the undivided attention, the coldest night you shared his coat and the warmth of his body, the solemn music, the vows, the kisses, the Majestic white dress,  your innocence, your naivete, your trust. You trusted him completely. You trusted him to always be there for you and you chose him as the vessel that could make the miracle Happen. Not once but several times over and you hold those precious gifts in your hands and you praise His name above for the tiny miracles, so tender and totally dependent on you.

You keep walking down the memory lane and along with those beautiful children you begin to wonder, why, why everything has changed,  why the criticism, the mockery, the name calling, the suffocating control.  You wonder what happened to the attentive, loving husband. Was it all a figment of your imagination?
It is too late for you. You are another victim of the unrepentant cycle of emotional abuse.
But it is never too late for the women in your life, the women at work, at the Parish, at home. Start educating your own daughters …and sons. Because a man needs to learn to be a gentleman, not a sorry excuse for a repeat of his father. 
Educate the young girls, the adolescents, the college gals, the young brides, the new mothers,  your dear personal friends and acquaintances.

Spread the word and raise awareness because mental,  psychological and emotional abuse DOES HAPPEN. Regardless of race, creed, social status and degrees hanging on the walls. It does Happen. And the victims do not comprehend  it until it’s too late and their voices have been silenced and their options are non existent. And those around them shush them up. Do not stir the pot. Hush hush .

No one can decide a woman’s future but herself. Yet, she needs a strong foundation to dream away, to soar high in the sky  and to cross off  her accomplished dreams from her My perfect life list.  Life itself is full of detours but a strong woman can navigate through those detours much more aptly if the right man is by her side.
All left to be done is read on this article and share it with the people that need it the most, the younger generations. 

Recognizing Depression in Children – NewLifeOutlook

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http://depression.newlifeoutlook.com/recognizing-and-treating-depression-in-children/

I sincerely encourage adults who are in direct contact with children every day to read this article. 
Whether you are a parent, a grandparent, a teacher or a medical professional  this article might help you to identify children and adolescents suffering from depression.

There are significant differences between the way a young child or a teenager express their depression compared to adults.

A teenager, for example, might become hurtful, irritated and aggressive all of the sudden. Most of the time, this type of behavior is chalked up to typical puberty hormones. Not quite so.  Adolescence may be and it is a time of drastic changes in a young person but not all bizarre or significantly inappropriate behavior can be attributed to the influx of new sexual hormones. 

The increasing violence in our society, most noticeable in mass murders sprees, bullying, drugs, and the desintegration of families are some of the most prominent factors to impact significantly negatively our children.

I grew up in an era where children were just children, they would play outside all day long with their neighbors. They would be monitored by their neighborhood’s friends. Activities were all collectively shared by friends. Bicycle rides, hopscotch, hide and seek, fishing, playing marbles, were all games and Activities that kept us children engaged in healthy interactions with our peers.

The struggles of the adults were for the most part kept hidden from the younger generations.

There was more time to interact with our mothers and other family members. We had a support network that is not present anymore.

I firmly believe that all of those drastic changes in our society have contributed to the significantly rise in depression onset in our newer generations.

It is imperative therefore,  that we all become familiar with the signs and symptoms of chronic depression in the most vulnerable members of society – our children. 

I must emphasize that there are three distinctive  scenarios that contribute to  children and adolescents fall prey to the claws of depression. These are,  victims of abuse in any of its forms by relatives or non – relatives, victims of paternal abuse, and children who have witnessed  and lived through traumatic divorces. In general, all divorces wreak  havoc in children’s lives.

Another subset of children that do not fare very well in their development are those who live in a household where one of the parents is chronically ill. This might be a factor overlooked by most adults interacting with children but the fear of the uncertainty, the suffering and tears from the sick parent, the disruption in the family life caused by a chronic illness is in most cases too much to bear for a child making him prone to fall into the abyss of depression.
The old saying It takes a village to raise a child is as valid today as centuries ago.
Let us all unite our efforts for the benefit of the most precious gift in life;  our sons and daughters, our nephews and nieces, our grandchildren, our young patients, our pupils.

Happy 76th Birthday! Tina Turner Reminds Us Why She is ‘Simply the Best’ – Power of Humans

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http://powerofhumans.com/2015/12/happy-76th-birthday-tina-turner-reminds-us-why-she-is-simply-the-best/

Dang those legs!
Tina Turner celebrating her 76th birthday in a concert …
Lady looks splendid
Roll it on the river will always be a favorite … but what I truly Admire about her is the fact that she escaped a dangerously toxic relationship which undoubtedly saved her life

It took great courage and the help of family and a very special friend. 
Victims of abuse cannot escape without a solid Network of support

Her book I, Tina and the movie based on her life are great sources of inspiration for those women struggling to leave a violent, abusive partner.

Abuse comes in all forms; physical,  mentally, emotionally,  sexually and neglect. They all forms might intertwine and be present simultaneously. Victims are so confused, scared and brainwashed that they cannot distinguish the burry lines that separate them from a healthy romantic relationship.

I have mentioned this book as a reference before but here it goes again

The answer to the  main question on the mind of abuse victims …

WHY DOES HE DO THAT
Inside the mind of angry and controlling men

BY Lundy Bancroft

Share with all of your friends…
You never know which friend,  which woman and children might be spared from a lifetime of abuse or worse. ..

Abuse is in many instances, unrecognized until it is too late
In some cases,  the subject is taboo and families go to great extent to cover up their personal drama until one day it all explodes leaving irreparably damage.